Monday, August 2, 2010

ON FUN ~ Yes, I Was Checking Out Their Ass...


So while looking for something in my saved photo folders over the weekend, I came across a slew of shots I had completely forgotten about that made me laugh. You see, back in the early Spring I went along on a ski/music fest weekend trip to Vermont with Andy and our friends. I don't ski and I wasn't a fan of the host band's music so my role was babysitter back at the condo. But I did get out one afternoon to see a few other bands perform at one of the lodges which was fun.

As I sat back enjoying my brewski and the tunes, my mind wandered and I noticed that my view was at the exact height of everyone's ass standing before me. I began analyzing the variety of butts surrounding me - and took out my camera to document them all. My friend got a big chuckle out of my documentation and I thought you might too. So here is a sampling of a cross section of society's butts for your viewing pleasure - sorry none of them are of naked hotties:

SAGGY BUTT ~ This is the first one I noticed and practically screamed out to be documented. You would think his butt was at his knees.

STRETCHED OUT BUTT ~ This one's got the pockets properly positioned height-wise but they seem to be a little too tight across the hips - stretching that seam out.

WALLET BUTT ~ Guys - use a money clip. Wallets make you look lopsided by enhancing or magnifying one cheek and not the other.

FLAT BUTT ~ This butt needs a few wallets stuffed in it - or better fitting jeans.

CONCAVE BUTT ~ Just when you thought it couldn't get any worse than the flat butt, the no-butt makes an appearance.

THE GUT AND BUTT ~ This guy's just got it all goin' on and he isn't hiding beneath baggy clothes. Maybe he and the Concave Butt should switch pants.

DAY-GLO BUTT ~ This guy was stuck in the 80's, but he was attracting all the babes - who went looking for a butt beneath that ski suit.

PREPPY BUTT ~ Sometimes it is all in the pose. This guy tried to rock the J.Crew look but he had some wallet enhancement going on that was initially overlooked due to the properly positioned pocket heights and jaunty hip action.

GIRL BUTT ~ When I began to wonder if there were any cute butts to be found in this joint Andy pointed this one out to me.

CARGO BUTT ~ This was the best butt I found there. He wasn't hiding in his cargo pants - these fit just right. And gave me a nice view while I finished my beer.

FAMILIAR BUTTS ~ I made the boys do a lineup when we got home just to see how their asses looked in comparison. They need some work. Can you guess which one belongs to Andy?

17 comments:

cardiogirl said...

I'm going with my first guess (since I've already started second-guessing myself) Andy is on the far right.

And I enjoyed the description of the guy with the jaunty hip. Awesome name for a book.

Susan said...

You gave me my first laugh this morning, Molly! Cute, very cute!

I don't know which one is Andy, but the guy on the left has it goin' on.

Sandy Nawrot said...

I think this is my favorite post of the year. I've always known I could totally hang with you, but this just confirms it. In college, my best friend and I would go to bars and if we were interested in a guy, we would respectfully ask him to turn around before we took things further. As for my guess on Andy's butt? The middle one.

Penny said...

I vote preppy butt :)

boliyou said...

Ah, the sacrifices we make for science.

Jen said...

This cracked me up! I have always wanted to do something like this but never had the courage to hooray for you for having no fear. I have no idea which one is Andy.

McGillicutty said...

tooooo freakin' funny!!!! love it.

stacybuckeye said...

Did anyone notice you taking these photos? Too funny.

Margot at Joyfully Retired said...

ON FUN was too much fun today. I have also done extensive "research" in this area. I wish I had thought to photo my research.

As an observer of this area of the male anatomy I can say that today's fashion choices are not conducive to showing them off at their best. Today's pants are just too baggy or guys are wearing them too baggy.

I think Andy is on the far right.

Matty said...

So then, when I'm out in public, women are checking out my butt? And taking pictures too?? Now I feel so self-conscious. LOL

If I had known you were going to post a picture of Andy's butt, I would have paid more attention to it in Philly. I'll go with the one in the middle. Just a guess of course, so if I'm right, it's not that I was checking him out or anything.

kaye said...

nice ass-ortment of butts ;P

I'll watch for the big reveal on which is Andy.

The Bumbles said...

Susan was the only one to recognize that the guy with it all goin' on is in fact Andy - the cute butt on the far left ;0)

Dave and Tami said...

There are some nice - and some not so nice - asses in your shots, but you just can't beat a nicely shaped ass in Wranglers over cowboy boots. I know - Yeehaw! - but you need to check it out :)

Bibliophile By the Sea said...

I have to say that although I have not been around a while, I came back to a wonderful laugh. What a butt collage.

bermudaonion said...

This is hilarious, but I'm wondering how you got that photo of my hubby's butt in there!

LJ said...

The trend for saggy pant butts for men should transcend and woman adopt the style. I've got the saggy butt part, just not the pants part. It might cover up a lot of sins.

Kathleen said...

Oh my gosh, I am falling off my chair laughing right now!