Friday, September 16, 2011
I woke up this morning looking much like my little Sammy up there - scrunched and squirmy, looking to stretch out and pry one eye open at a time to grudgingly meet the day. Of course, the reason I was so grumpy was because it was far too early for this Bumble to be getting up but right on time for baby Bumble. But my waking up process was made better by the fact that Andy greeted me with birthday wishes, reminding me that today wasn't just another day.
Today I turn 41. Some days it feels like old lady territory. Other days it feels no different than my 20's. For me, age is truly just a number because age is relative. Old to me may be young to you. Or vice versa. Ask any kid to describe their twenty-something teacher and they'll say that they are super old. I might think that little old lady at the grocery store is nearing the end of the line but she considers herself a spring chicken compared to her poor old fogey friends she visits stuck in the nursing home.
I don't have time to feel out my age. I have to blog standing up for God's sake because it is impossible to sit down with a baby strapped to your chest in a carrier. Are those sore joints and back pains I feel stabbing at me because of toting sweet Sammy around all day in my arms or because that's just what happens in your 40's? Like I said, I don't have time to figure that out. He keeps me busy and active and that keeps me young.
I may not feel young when I bend over to hoist him onto my shoulder for a burp or a snuggle, but how old I am is the last thing I'm thinking about at that moment. I'm thinking about how little he is and how he's growing up too fast. Doesn't he know to take it slow and savor everything? That another day in the world is a blessing to be appreciated? That he shouldn't rush things? Before you know it, he'll be old like me.
I'm going to celebrate another year of my life by cracking open a cold one tonight and most likely promptly falling asleep on the couch before 9:00. But that lack of energy isn't because I'm old. It's because newborns suck the life out of you. The best gift will be Andy getting up in the middle of the night to feed Sammy. But then of course I'd miss looking into that baby's sweet face and being enveloped in love. Guess I'll scrunch up my face, pry open my eyes, stretch and drag these old bones out of bed after all.