GYM RATS - #5
“Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average. Which means you've met your New Year's resolution.”
~Jay Leno
Two New Year’s ago I slapped on a nicotine patch and needed something to keep my mind off the butts. So I dragged Andy’s butt instead down to the local gym and signed us up for a 2 year contract. Neither of us had seen the inside of a gym past high school. Seemed like a sound investment to me.
Two years later we are still going to the gym - more stubborn than determined. As sentimental and encouraging as I should be to other gym newbies this time of year starting their own resolutions, I really just wish they would take their hopeful heinies out of my way.
After two years I have become a gym snob. I get bothered when my routine gets interrupted because someone else has the nerve to be learning how to use the weight machines. I get annoyed when the cardio machines with the individual TV’s are all in use by people not even watching the TV’s. But I get royally pissed off if all the good parking spots are filled up by the infiltration of New Year’s newbies. God forbid I actually have to walk more than a few steps to work out! Don’t these people know how much these obstacles give me reason to skip the gym entirely?
I know that if I just give it a few weeks the majority of these newbies will get tripped up by their own distractions, stress, food, and fun, never to be seen in the gym again. Is it bad that I root for weakness so I can have my gym routine back?
I think next year I will take the first two weeks of January off from my gym and let the newbies get this silly exercise idea out of their system. But we should be thankful for those persevering few who stick around. After all, they provide me with new material to share with you!
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5 comments:
I'd love to go to the gym. I just need my stupid freakin knee to stop acting up every other day.
Love this post. Love your avatar too!! Anyway, too many people, that's why I turned a spare bedroom into a home gym. I have more in there to keep my attention than the public gym does. And I don't even have to wipe the sweat off the machines. But on the down side, I don't have a trainer to keep me in line, I can slack off if I want. Right now my knee is giving me trouble AGAIN, so I'm not working out. Hope that changes soon!
I was a gym rat for years and then my gym closed. Since then, I've never been able to find another gym I liked and my routine went down the drain. Wish I could get back in gear, but so far no luck. I admire your stick-to-it-iveness.
I love this post. It is laugh out loud funny. And, very well written. I like your lead in quote of Jay Leno's. Keep writing this good stuff. I'll keep reading.
Man I read almost this exact same post written by a friend of mine a year or two ago. She said almost exactly what you did.
Great minds and all that I guess...
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