Thursday, August 25, 2011

ON FAMILY ~ A Baby Story Behind The Blog...


So I bet you would like to know how we went from our normal On Blogging posts to suddenly throwing up a photo of a newborn announcing the birth of our little boy. Two things you should already know about us Bumbles - we like revealing happy surprises and we are private folks. So when we discovered we were expecting, I decided right away that the news would stay off the blog until our baby was born.

A part of me was paranoid. As a first time mother to be, I was of course anxious about the pregnancy and all the pitfalls that the medical community scares you with on a regular basis with tests and evaluations. In addition, I was a geriatric mother to be since I was well beyond the ripe old age of 35. Which means that my risks for all of those pitfalls multiply by scary numbers. So if I was worried enough to hold my breath the first few months and keep the news a secret from all family and friends, I certainly wasn't about to post about it here right away.

As things progressed and my pregnancy went smoother than silk, I was tempted to write about the experience here for posterity. But it was just as easy to document things privately with the same results. And so the secret remained.

At one point, when certain hurdles had passed, I did share the news privately with a few bloggers I have ongoing relationships with through collaborations or friendships or both. All were sworn to secrecy in order to protect our privacy. These folks kept things under wrap and even sent along generous gifts and words of wisdom to highly inexperienced Bumbles awaiting their baby. A perfect example of how the blogosphere can be a wonderful place to build relationships and find support.

Having a child was always something we welcomed but not something we went out of our way to accomplish. If it happened, it happened - so to speak. When we learned that at the age of 40, that baby we'd wondered about had finally decided to arrive, we were pleasantly surprised. It wasn't unexpected, but the particular timing did catch us off guard. Having always been a master procrastinator, I should have known.

When you are an old lady like myself carrying a child, there are moments when you do math in your head and worry that your procrastination may have been selfish when your child is going to grow up with parents who won't be around as long as most kids'. And then you remember that life is fragile for everyone and none of us know how long our time here will be. So who is to say that us old fogies will die off sooner than later?

Morbid thoughts, but they are hard to avoid when you are reminded of your age whenever you go in for a check-up. However, the perk of being an old pregnant lady is that you get to see lots and lots of images of your baby to be. I must have had a gazillion ultrasounds over the months. I have stacks of ultrasound photos - most of which look like sketchy weather radar maps instead of clear images of a nose or toes. But I did receive one of those fancy 3-D ultrasounds at one visit that showed me a photo of our child. With my nose - clear as day. There it was. Blew me away. This wasn't just a fuzzy grey blob in there - it was someone with features from me and from Andy. His big feet, my big nose. Poor kid.

I wanted to know the sex, in order to make the name selection an easier process. You would think that with 40 years to think it over, we would have had favorite names already in place. But no. Over the years I had favorite names come and go. And then of course since every person we know had a child at some point, a lot of the good names were already taken. Since Andy preferred to have the baby's sex be a surprise, we therefore needed to come up with two names. Andy referred to Baby Bumble as Stanley (be it a boy or a girl) throughout the pregnancy in honor of the Bruins' quest for the Stanley Cup which they eventually won. Instead of a diaper cake at my baby shower, I received a replica Stanley Cup made from diapers. In order to select official names Andy made lists. I made lists. We compared lists. I nixed all of his names. He nixed most of mine. In the end, for a boy, Samuel stood out. It has a sentimental family connection on my side and was a name we both liked - in all incarnations of Sam, Sammy or Samuel.

My pregnancy was pretty perfect. I never had a moment of morning sickness. No bizarre food cravings. My weight gain was gradual and within the healthy range. I continued to work out into my 9th month which kept me from having back pain or swelling. There were never any questionable test results. No scary pains or spotting. Nothing troublesome at all. My chart said I was a high risk patient but my physical being said otherwise. Being the worrier that I am, I kept waiting for the shoe to drop.

Perfection went out the window when my due date came and went. Even though things were healthy and normal, my old age kept hanging over everything. And my health insurance was changing within the week, creating a new deductible with it. Then there was the fact that this baby was projected to be a biggy - around 9 pounds most likely. Get that kid out, they said. Inducement here we come. Two days of trying to coax this baby out was not painful or worrisome - just two days spent back and forth in the hospital watching bad TV and playing cards. When my body and the baby's finally decided to get their act together and kick start the labor process, things progressed right quickly. So quickly that I hadn't finished hearing the explanation of the epidural process and pros and cons before that first contraction hit like a ton of bricks. My anesthesiologist was speedy and got me numbed up in no time.

Somewhere along the way I contracted a fever and the baby's heart rate spiked for a prolonged period of time. Since all the pushing in the world wasn't bringing that baby out quickly, I ended up in the O.R. with a c-section - a process that made Andy a bit queasy and stressed out. It was bizarre to be laying on a table removed completely from the action - without feeling anything or seeing beyond that blue tarp separating me from the rest of the room. Then suddenly this little messy head popped up over the top of that screen and looked down at me - my son. Baby Sammy. Off Andy went on the other side of the screen with Sammy and the doctors to cut the cord, clean him up and check him out (weighing less than 8 pounds contrary to projections). It seemed like forever before they came back to my side and brought him with them. I got to hold him while they wheeled me to recovery - my first private moments with him. And then he went up to Special Care to make sure my fever hadn't given him an infection - which it had not.

We spent most of a week in the hospital from the inducement and labor to c-section recovery time (discharged the day before our insurance changed - woo-hoo!). We likely met every nurse in the department. They taught us how to nurse, bathe and soothe our little Bumble. And then I hobbled home and struggled through some additional post-surgery developments while family and close friends pitched in to help us out for the first two weeks.

Andy went back to work and I sat here face to face with a screaming newborn. How strange motherhood can be. Another private moment - just he and I. He's giving me the old one-eye right now, waking from a nap whose quiet time is as luxurious to me as it is beneficial for him. But the alert time is even better - crying included. He was with me for 9 months - our own little dance between his kicks and my body that I knew so well. And now he is here face to face. Telling me what he thinks in a language I don't speak. But I'm figuring it out. Behind the blog.

22 comments:

Julie said...

So amazing and awesome. Congrats!
:) Thanks for sharing. You have been missed and I have been sending happy thoughts your way :)
and Welcome Sam !

kaye said...

a delightful baby story--I'm glad all is well. Love to you, Andy and little Sammy. My mother gave me the best advice on the birth of my first child that I've recieved on child-rearing. "Enjoy every minute, it doesn't last that long."

rhapsodyinbooks said...

Wonderful story, and he's totally gorgeous! Congratulations!!!

Janet said...

I'm so very happy for the 3 of you :-)

Julie said...

Congratulations on the addition of little Samuel to the Bumble clan! Love the picture :) I'm glad that everything with your pregnancy went well. You have given me a glimmer of hope.

Margot said...

I'm so glad you posted this story as I've been thinking of you. Glad to hear you are doing well and making that day by day adjustment to motherhood. Thanks also for the picture. He is just the cutest newborn.

Lisa said...

Your last paragraph brought tears to my eyes! How wonderful that everything went so well for you; you sure have a beautiful little boy!

stacybuckeye said...

Little Sammy is gorgeous! I know what you mean about doing the math. I'm still doing it 10 months in. Life is fragile and enjoy each day. Those crying days will pass. Start a good sleep schedule and place (his bed) early. You'll be thankful later. This is spoken from a new mom who has a child who refuses to nap anyplace but our bed.
Anyhoo, your delivery sounds similar to mine but minus all the drugs. C-sections are no fun.

Gage has one last gift to send-it's sitting here, but I realized it was missing a little something so it will have to wait another day. It's great to see you back.

Nolatari said...

Congratulations on every awesome, scary, crazy, miraculous thing about being new parents! Even if we all don't get to share each detail. ;-)

Kaye said...

He was sure worth the wait! Such a gorgeous baby boy. Enjoy this special time with him. Thank you for posting this.

Sandy Nawrot said...

Oh, look at his pose! Such a boy. I love hearing people's baby stories. And listen here, you are not an old fogey, and it is a testament to your fitness that you had such an uncomplicated pregnancy. I'm really so happy for you guys. You are blessed.

hmsgofita said...

A big hearty congrats again! He's so beautiful. Thank you for sharing your story. I also had to go through crappy labor and a c-section to get my little one out. So I really do feel for you on the recovery and hard that it is being a first-time mom. Looks like things are working themselves out! I hope your scar is healing up nicely and that you are enjoying every minute! Hugs!

Lin said...

Awww, what a happy story! Not everything needs to be shared on the blog--especially with children. I share some, but not all. Some things just need to be private, I think.

That said, I certainly wish you all the very best and lots of joy. This child will change you and your life 10 times over--all for the good. As hard as parenthood is, it has incredible rewards and joy.

Please post his photo from time to time so we can see your little guy grow. And give him a giant smoochie from Aunt Lin!

Susan said...

He is so handsome, Molly! And I think his nose is perfect (and I'm betting yours is, too). What joy he has brought to you and Andy and your families...I can tell by the sound of your "voice". What joy he will continue to bring to you, even into your old age. :) Enjoy every moment of every day, even the crying and screaming. He will grow out of it soon enough. Give that little punkin a kiss and a squeeze from me.

XOXOXO
Susan

Kristi said...

I was definitely surprised when you announced it. he is absolutely beautiful! Congratulations!

The Gal Herself said...

I kept scrolling back up and looking into Sam's wise face and relaxed pose as I read your post. I suspect I was gazing upon an adorable photo of an alpha male who will, indeed, tell you what he thinks.

But Boston has hosted many alpha male souls over the years, from Paul Revere to David Ortiz, so Sam is joining is illustrious company.

Congratulations and thank you for sharing the photo and the lovely post.

Nicole said...

Here we have it...his name is Samuel! What a wonderful recount of your pregancy and birth for your readers and blogging friends. I'm not even 30 yet and already I feel like if I don't find a man, get married and have a child by 35, I will have missed my opportunity to do so forever. All of that is to say that your experience goes to show that sometimes, things happen the way they are supposed to , at the time that they are meant to occur and not a moment before....which that mention of going past the due date and then going from pushing to co-section serves as a reminder that things happen in their own time.

While I missed you guys these last few weeks and was totally surprised with news of the baby, I can understand your decisions on keeping it private and sharing the news only with close family and friends. We live in a time when just about everything is shared and available for access, so one can appreciate the little-big moments that are so dear to your heart and so important to remain on good standing (regarding the baby's health, the mother and father's health, the couple's relationship, etc.) that it can be necessary to not blog about it until the time is right.

Congrats on a healthy baby and a healthy pregnancy! May you, Andy and little Samuel have lots more private moments in the midst of your blogging activities :)

The Madlab Post

Anonymous said...

LOVE HIM!!!!

Auntie Mary

Kathleen said...

He's beautiful Molly and I know that you and Andy must be over the moon. Enjoy every minute with the little guy. He'll be reading books and wearing a ball cap in no time!

Mrs. C. said...

My beautiful Nephew! I loved this post and I love you guys so much. Can't wait to see him again.

Jenny Girl said...

This is a wonderful story. I would have kept things hush, hush too. No need to apologize for that. Glad everything went well, even though a c-section was required. Sammy is a great name and it fits your cute little baby so well. Congratulations and here's to many happy but possibly sleepless nights :)
{{hugs}}

Matty said...

Once again, a hearty CONGRATULATIONS to you and Andy. Mary and I are thrilled for both of you. Sammy looks like a charmer already, and is that a rocket on his shoulder I see? ( aka: 100MPH fastball).

It won't be long before you're taking pictures of him at his first ball game.